I think a lot about my place in the universe, the foot print I leave in a people's lives and my own life.
Sometimes I look at how ambitious, how driven and focused I was to be in the industry I wanted to be in... and then I made the decision that worked for me, I had my babies. Right when things were starting off for me... something made me regroup and decided it would have to wait I need to start having my family NOW! Anyone in the fashion industry (in which I dabble my little pinkie toe lately) would stare in disbelief when I told them I was pregnant... how do you give up something sooo fantastic, how do you NOT go to NYC to pursue the paid internship in PR... come on.
But I did it, and I use to perhaps rehash the thoughts over and over again until I heard this woman speak... Carolina Herrera! If you don't know the name it's synonymous with socialite elite fashion, the dresser of Renee Zellweger--- to me it's role model material. Someone might ask people who do you look up to? I didn't have an answer for that question til just recently... and now I heard her talk and I have one. Why her? She said the only thing that rang true in my life... "you can have children and come back and have a successful career when you are ready..." don't quote it... but it goes something like that. She had her kids, she fully raised her kids and then she followed her dreams.
She didn't believe the hype, that age dismisses you... that being a certain age stifles your inner fashionista... please people--- those barking fashionisms down your throat are not young and ripe any longer but old and pruned... they bring a sophistication and a class but Karl Lagerfeld no ones baby, Anna Wintour not spring chicken either... so who says that someone with age can't be reverent, they can't play in the field of FASHION.
So perhaps others see me going backwards... career, marriage and then children... but I like the fact that I have my babies, I like the fact that they inspire me to follow my dreams... and I can go forward only being more certain in the things that I want and not in a naive post teen kind of a way, but a mature sophisticated (OK only slightly sophisticated) manner.
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