Taking deep breaths!

People always ask how it is to be a parent of many children... while I usually feel like saying it is just what it is; I understand that our lifestyle/household isn't the norm.

So most people don't have 4 kids. So most people who have 4 kids don't live in a home in a downtown core with limited space. But I don't deem my life any different than those with 1 kid or 2. The only truth I know is I relish my deep breaths.

I know my moments of quiet are limited and I have documented that sleep is something I tend to sacrifice for sanity or work. And many will say better sleep equals more sanity but it doesn't feel that way much lately. There are many moments in the last year when sanity seemed fleeting but when I could sneak in a pause, a deep breath... I enjoyed every millisecond in it.

Life is short, it isn't an understatement. You need to look, take a deep look, and appreciate your kids at the age they are, the clean counter while it's clean, the smell of baby skin, the sound of that cackling giggle coming out of your child. Just let it seep in with your breath, feel it in your pores, absorb it in with all 5 senses.

And I promise for that moment, that breath you are exactly the same as the girl without a care in the world but your life is slightly more full. Filled with people, filled with noise, filled with love.

Parenting: Self esteem and pride.

It's an interesting day when you walk into your local Starbucks and one of your favorite barista starts her greeting with your kids are the best.

The last time we were in there my daughters followed her around the store talking to her about themselves and learning about how the coffee shop runs itself. That day in particular my daughter was beaming from ear to ear because she had beat her fellow classmate, who happens to be the fastest girl in her class, in a race.

I encourage these moments of pride because they balance out a world where a child is down on themselves for lack capabilities in other areas.

But then barrista turns to me and says she was telling me about her race and I say to her it must feel good to beat someone and my daughter without a beat turns to her and says:

"No, I was fast because I believed in myself."

Now here is the barrista in front of me gushing about my daughter, I'm trying to stay beyond humble... but inside I'm wanting to high five my girl.

The world is full of constant reminders that girls have a chance of self esteem issues. That we need to foster their strengths. Ohhh and having 4 girls makes those messages 4x more valid.

But today I get to have the pride. I get to relish on the good moment, I get to balance my own mother moments with a check mark of a win moment.

The great adventure of 4

I don't post much lately... which is quite sad. Honestly sad.

I do miss blogging, I miss sharing... but who knew 4 babies would alter your train of thought.

Each child uniquely easy... one likes colouring, the other to play outside, one reading or Dora episodes on TV and the other just breastfeeding... but put them together and somehow more than one is begging for your attention.

There is a ton of learning patience that wouldn't be taught if there was one or even just 2. Someone daily feels they got the shaft... but what they don't realize its been 2 hours since I started making something for myself to eat and then I get asked to make a snack for someone, change a diaper, read this note from the teacher, put on this movie, help my jacket is stuck, mom she called me the S word... ohhh and my warm bagel is no longer warm, my coffee is frozen and I still haven't fed myself.

Then the emails come through; Girl Guides telling me about the week's activities, dancing, the principal's emails, text messages come through, read them but someone is calling your name or someone just spilt something on the brand new hardwood floors.

Nothing gets a response... I get an Instagram picture in, I see a quick article on Facebook (I am entrenched in this measles outbreak and what I think is encroaching on people's Human Rights by forcing vaccines but that's for another post) and I share it. The news is playing in the background but I can't hear what its saying... I catch tidbits here and there.

By the time dinner comes around there is a mountain of laundry sitting on the couch to be folded and then headed to bed its silly chaos. Something about the words "ok, everyone upstairs let's get ready for bed" means lets go upstairs jump on the beds, be extra silly, take forever to put on pjs. Eldest reads to the baby, putting on a diaper of my toddler (wishing and praying she'd go pee in a potty) the slowest to get ready is doing God knows what instead of brushing her teeth. And then they are all ready.

and all I want to do...

is take pictures of them because at this very moment they never looked more beautiful, more sweet, more loving and just perfect.

Being a mom of 4 isn't easy but being a mom to these 4 is a blessing. And while I miss blogging I understand that it needs to come when it can because right now I am busy being mom.