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Showing posts with label feelings. Show all posts

It's lingering...


I don't know what's been bothering me lately, I can't shake the feeling....

It's been lingering it's ugly head... RESENTMENT! I can't get rid of it's ugliness but it's been feeding off of me for a couple of days and I can't shake it.

I have been thinking a lot about my future, my footing, my position in my work; and then I remember some of the people my life has crossed paths with. I am the girl who doesn't burn bridges, I am the girl who if you burn me I will still talk to you the next morning because there is no need to hold a grudge and be angry.

I don't want you to think telling me being angry is an acceptable feeling... because I don't live in that head space; but I have met a lot of BITCHES (Male and Female... let's be honest) and my industry is a small place. But some of those lovelies that I have crossed wouldn't be so kind, even after stabbing you in the back, after you dealt with them, worked with them--- you know they won't have one nice thing to say about you because they only know how to work on the bitchy level that is their realm.

So I look to my future with resentment, that I dealt with the people I did; that as poorly they were that as garish and cruel, they can be the thorn in my side if I want to move on... they will be the poor person to make a nice comment, they are not the people who live by the saying if you don't have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all! Why and how did I work/deal with these people... why did I ever need to cross paths with people so crass???

But I can't shake my bitterness, my anger, my frustration towards these situations--- when they happened so long ago and I wasn't scathed at those time. Now I am angered and frustrated.

I have my daughters, my home and my vegetable garden... but they won't fix my needs for career success!
Cheers!~

Rain, rain go away...


Ohhh the misery that is the rain...

I love to sit on my porch and watch an impeccable thunderstorm but we've had abnormal rain season here in Toronto for end of spring.

But this gloomy and muggy weather is making me nuts... we don't have A/C and the truth is I don't really care that we don't anymore, but our house becomes unbearably humid during these freak rain storms. I live in perma nasty hair... only because it's frizzy and out of control it is making me mental.

Now I think I understand what those in Vancouver or London feel like... but seriously... I can't wait til it's little spring showers and not much more.
Cheers!~