Keeping secrets!

Today I received a phone call about my open book quality...

Let me explain! My parents were secret keepers, from each other, from their kids, from their friends and their peers at large. No body needed to know anything about them that wasn't filtered through their well orchestrated facade. Now before you see it as a complaint of their upbringing to keep it all on the download, it's more about how their behaviour has taught be to be the utter opposite.

I am an Open Book... I share and share and share. Funny enough, I feel like I don't share it all. I feel like people sometimes still don't see the whole me, even though I try so hard to be as open as possible. Now I don't see myself as a brand and so my open and honest self is not a PR motivated self to accumulate a certain amount of followers for my blog, twitter or facebook.

On day to day I will share how happy I am, how in love I am, how frustrated I am, how tired I am, how confused I am, how politically charged I am, how get with the program irritated I am... it's a daily practice in releasing my personal thoughts, and the release is so great. I put it out there for the world and universe to hear, it's out there off my chest and floating around there not hurting me or anyone anymore.

But as of late I have gotten a ton of flack for my openness.., why do you share, why are you so happy, you think you are happier, smarter, or your issues are the only ones that matter. Say what? I am just sharing my life because I like to share. I believe if someone really doesn't want to know about my happy moments well they can move along and go read someones miserable moments.

I am not looking for approval in my openness... I won't change, I won't be silenced or filtered... just because this is who I am. Plus a ton more, I am a lot of person, a lot of thought, complex and individual but most of all I am ME. The sharer of moments, the open book generation X/Y blend of being born the year I was born, the social media lover, the life of the party, the dancer on the speakers... I have never been shy, never hid to not be seen, never wanted to be a run of the mill person who follows the fold. So if you want to stay secretive that's great, but I like being me... and thanks for the concern, I am really Happy with ME!

Evicting Baby!

I have been pregnant a great 39+ weeks... and I am ready to have this baby leave my body.
Look don't get me wrong, I knew I was pregnant a week before I could test because my body started to act pregnant, I was exhausted as of 3 weeks into the pregnancy... and the exhaustion never went away.
The pelvic pain started around the middle of the pregnancy... now don't believe this happens in all pregnancies, and as my Ob/Gyn laughs at me constantly when I walk into her room for my scheduled appointments, she says to me that is the beast of having more than 2 babies. Let me tell you Relaxin is a bitch, while it allowed me to cross my legs til the end of this pregnancy, I only could no longer do it as of last week. But I could do so much physically except for walking for long periods of time or changing my physical direction (been sitting for too long, ha walking is not going to happen/ been laying in bed, getting up is impossible).

I love having babies, I have already complained about never having liked the actually activity of carrying a baby.

My girls were both induced babies... Eldest came out early out of concern she'd be enormous, HA, she weighed a mere 6lbs. Youngest over went her due date and well she got forced out too... this child has changed the game... I have been in active False labour for a week. Don't get me wrong, I am excited, I am hopeful I will enjoy the chance to turn to my husband and say: "Hunny, It's time, contractions are saying it's time!" or "Hunny.... my water broke" these are privileges I never got to indulge in.

It must have entertained the nurse in Triage yesterday when I called and asked for confirmation of how often my contractions should be and when I should go into the ward. Her first question was how many births have I already had I said 2... but never got to feel a contraction, please I never even had a Braxton Hicks with my girls.

So this is a love letter to my baby... you are being evicted now... come out please everyone wants to meet you!!!

Sincerely MOM!~