How many minutes in the day do you hate your husband?

A story came out this week while Sarah Jessica Parker was doing press for her new film 'I don't know how she does it' was quoted saying that she keeps things sane by letting herself hate her husband for about 20 minutes a day... people were up in arms thinking this is a sign of a failing marriage and an unhealthy one.


On any day of the week you can catch me and ask me how I feel about my husband and I will speak his praises, he's awesome, he's beyond helpful, he picks up the slack when I am being a turd... but I see him daily, he does little things that set me off and for that moment I want to blow up and I just vent for a few minutes.

And perhaps for about 20 minutes I might even hate the man who I am deeply madly in love with at most time. Does it mean we are destined to fail... on the contrary I actually think it might mean we will succeed!

Entering my 30s brought a new part of my social life, in our 20s all our friends started getting married, and now enters the time of our marriage where we are watching others around me getting a divorce. It's sad, I won't lie! I always wish my friends the best, but having to part ways with someone you loved so much can never be easy. But in the age of dating for eons and then marrying after and learning to cope with the stresses of life; I think people get the ideas of Happy Marriage mixed with love and passion.

I have heard of many people in our age group who move out of mommy and daddy's home to get into their newly marital home and as soon as the going gets tough and that moment you realise you hate your husband... it's like a light goes off to get up and bail. If you can't get past the Hate, well let's be honest your marriage is doomed anyways but can you let go off the Hate, did you even try? You loved for so long... can you hate for as long as you LOVED?

So if anyone ever asks me how do we work I say we have our great days and sometimes we might bicker like crazy, but we love each other, want growth and happiness for each other and we still have passion (this could be long and versed so I'll pass on sharing now)... but we might hate each other for a few minutes, sometimes we might even hate each other for the whole day because we are stubborn mules who want our way for a certain decision... but at the end of the day... We love each other so much!

I grew up in a household where fighting between parents never happened, but resentment infested their spirits and love, and like many people my age I come from a divorced home. But learning to fight it out like normal adults and learning to get over it... (like something I teach my daughters every day, she can hate what her sister might be doing but learning to accept her for who she is and how different she might be or how she sees something is nothing to stay angry about)... so I actually recommend you take a moment to praise the ones you love, accept their difference and love them and accept when you can stand them for that moment!

My husband and a friend of mine


No comments